Today I got up a little early then usual. I like to get up early in the morning when there is peace and calm and I can hope for some moments of solitude for me. These are the few moments which I look forward to every day.
A cup of coffee and the my bedroom window I am in my heaven. The whole household is sleeping blissfully.
In this moment I am me I am no one else. I can touch the core of my heart. The early morning breeze is playing with my hair, as I take a sip of coffee and look at the sky.
The eastern side is bright and colorful. I love this splash of colors, the new soft light of a day.
The early morning has became my closest friend. Every day I come to meet her and she is there waiting for me. To shower all the new colors on me with utmost softness. We ask each other how the night was for both of us. Was it anxious was, it disturbed was it angry.
And we tell each other our secrets. She complains of her moon and the moonlight which does not listen. I tell her about mine. Tell her why I was worried, why I thought of my granny, why I missed someone….
Sitting and looking at the sky I can see birds slowly waking and chirping and they make me happy. I wish I too had wings and could fly. Life would be so different flying at your own will and going high and soar along the wind touch some unknown horizons only to find some more of them. To sing a song like a bird in all abandon to be carefree To fly over the mountains far, far away to see the rivers flow and the oceans dance to the tune of this divine creator who plays a band so perfectly that not a tune is out of .
What should I call him a painter, a script writer, ….a father, a mother.
A nurturer, a friend….
He is perfect in every sense of the word, and you witness the perfect perfection in everything he does.
How could he think and create such perfections is beyond my comprehension.
How a tiny drop of water has the strength to become a cloud.
How a tiny seed has the whole program that makes it into a tree.
How a human brain can do so many things.
The most I marvel is the human heart. Not bigger than your fist it is this heart that makes us and breaks us. That loves to belong and wants to belong. That wants understanding and yearns for appreciation. That cries and breaks and aches. You may not know yourself but your heart knows you too well …a little to well and sometimes this heart can make you feel the guilt and remorse and so many other ….
And in the heart of your heart is a sanctuary where…. in this secret chamber are very precious memories of …..your life
Very fragile, very sweet some memories
Of your grandparent’s smile
Your mothers hug
Your first love
A dear friend whom you shared your childhood secrets
A rainy afternoon which was very special
An evening which you could never forget
A song which still haunts you with nostalgia
And somewhere near this sanctuary of the blooms of happy memories all of us. I mean most of us keep a cactus garden too.
With thorns of hurts
Cactus of bitterness
Rocks of guilt
Heaps of remorse
And so…. on and…and on
And we nurture this not so beautiful land in us very lovingly. Yes we do and we find a sadist pleasure in it too.
When we need is all love and hope light and smile we dwell in this dark world and go through these shreds and instances of our past life which we should let go.
I looked at the sky it was getting brighter. Soon the day would be here. A whole set of limited hours with unlimited demands. So much is crammed in a day that I hardly found time to be myself until the night comes and I lie in the bed thinking of the whole day gone by. But as I close my eyes to drift into the land of dreams I know the morning will be bright. I smile and look forward to meeting her again and share the peace and calm for the next day.
I dream of blooms
I dream of birds
I sing a song
I fly with wings
To unknown lands
Where I and me
And this friendship never ends